and actually I don’t feel sorry for feeling that way. It’s not exactly your fault either, but you should have at least watched how you treated me .Because I know I didn’t treat you like crap when you tried to smile at me, b/c that’s exactly what you did. Thank you for setting up the example of what I don’t want to be .
but everytime I see you I can’t help but have a bad image of you. Trust me, I don’t mean to, it’s just that your actions make me see you differently. Now I can’t even look at you. When I do, all I want to do is tell you off and tell you exactly how things are. I wouldn’t do this to anyone just cause. I would do this if I had a legitimate reason. And right about now I do. All I’m waiting for is for the right time to tell you all that has been bugging me.
A guy puts his hands on the straps of his backback and gets all timid and shy and just looks down b/c he knows he gonna start blushing. Then he blushes , smirks with eyebrows raised and those big eyes look like a puppy face . <3
So when people find out I’ve never had a boyfriend they don’t believe me. Idk if it’s the way I am or look that has stopped this from occurring to me, but it makes me wonder. How does it really feel holding someone’s hand and knowing nothing can pass through them? How does it feel to get a phone call in the middle of the night just for that special someone to say goodnight? How does it feel to know that you have your other half? How it feels to knowing your day has been sucky, yet you know the only thing you look forward to is seeing them.
Sure I’ve experienced some of these things and let me tell you, it is such a great feeling. But, i’ve never had an actual boyfriend. Part of it is because I’m scared of being in a relationship , and part of it because I end up not really liking some of the qualities in that person. I’m a person that likes to focus on school , and well I’m afraid that if I do end up getting in a relationship it’ll take my focus away from it.
But then I think, after all those experiences and all that time going on without that special someone I’ve become my own person. I see and try my best to learn from the experiences my friends or family go through in reguards to this. And then I think, there is a reason why this is so . There must be one. And then I find myself lucky for not having to go through the heartache and tears of being in a relationship. God has been spearing me that pain. And I thank him. This means that when I do find that someone it won’t be just another boyfriend. This relationship will be a genuine and hopefully a long relationship where we can be christ centered and learn to love eachother.
So I will wait and until them I will know what it means to take my heart, place it in the palm of my hands and place it in the palm of his hands. For God has the key and he will hand it down to who ever he believes can safely keep it.
that since, I haven’t had a bon fire in a while , and Sophie and others asked me to have one again, I should HAVE ONE ! HAHAHAH But, I’d like to make this one where we can all just bond ! I want to make it into a dance sesh with like a worshipping/singing sesh! That would be soooo sick ! Since I have a bunch of space, and you can clearly see that stars here, it would just be soooo great !!! Hmmm… I might just do it !
Wanna know why ? Because you hurt me when all I did was smile and try to make things look better for you . Thanks for all you’ve done for me, but I AM and HAVE BEEN done putting up with all your B.S. !
So I’m currently listing to a song that I can already see me performing on stage. I know I’m not as good as many dancers out there, but I have drive. I have the desire to fullfill my passion. This passion is dance.
I’ve only been actually taking a dance class for like half a yr. My whole life I enjoyed dancing as just a past time or something to do while I’m shopping at a store, but I never took a dance class. I love dancing and I love performing on stage. One thing is to be able to dance, but another thing is to bring the dance to life and reach out to every single one of the audience. That right there is what I call a being a dancer.